Serve me up another cockroach … I feel the munchies coming on.

by A.G. Howard

Mmmm. Tasty.

*Shudders* Okay, so I’m not really into eating bugs, although I've heard rumor they're high in protein.

The subject title is referring to my fear of writing action scenes, fight scenes in particular. In the earliest draft of my adult vampire fantasy (a book I wrote a couple of years ago), I skimmed through the biggest fight scene of the book, writing it in the narrative with the heroine looking back on it.

My writing group called me on the mat and said, “Write out that sucker, you lazy bum.” Okay, not in so many words, but they did subtly denote that I was above cutting corners at this point in my writing. The scene is toward the climax of the book, and truly, the reader deserves to see it played out.

For me, it wasn’t so much about being lazy as being FEARFUL. I am terrified of writing any kind of action scene, but fight scenes trump them all. Something about blending the movement and emotion of the characters—wanting to keep them real without feeling mapped out, wooden, or staged—really stokes my paranoia to a full fiery flame.

It’s like being on an episode of Fear Factor for writers. Remember this show?

 One of the most popular stunts was to make contestants eat live insects, like this lovely cave spider from Africa:

Yes, folks. Those are indeed claws. Imagine trying to swallow this fellow down while he's hanging onto your tonsils for dear life... *insert horrified scream here*

In my writer's worst nightmare, instead of handing me a plateful of cockroaches and earthworms to nibble on, the host hands me a blank piece of paper, a pen, and a prompt with the words: write a fight scene between a sisterhood clan of halfling vampires teamed up with a priest and their vampire enemies to defeat a rogue band of vampire super-beings; be sure to incorporate both martial arts and street fighting tactics, because the bad guys ain't gonna play nice.   

Eeps. I think I’d rather munch on a plate full of creepy crawler slaw. At least then, the only one who will be sick as a result of my stunt is me.

I was just curious, for the other writers out there, what's your Fear Factor episode? Is there any particular kind of scene that makes you curl up inside your shell, afraid to stick your head out? And how do you psyche yourself up to write it without resorting to the amateur “tell don’t show” tactic?

And for the readers, what are some of the best written fight scenes you've ever read? I'd love to have some good pointers for a fight scene I have coming up in my current work in progress. Or maybe I’ll just munch on some grilled crickets and call it a day. ;)

Step Into My Nightmare...

by A.G. Howard

True to the name of our blog, as authors, we love to write books that spike a reader's pulse to race. But we also love to read them.

Humans are one of the few creatures on this planet that actually gravitate toward what they fear -- going against the grain of instinct. You  wouldn't see a mouse climbing all over a sleeping cat (except maybe in a Tom & Jerry cartoon) just for the adrenaline rush. Yet humans will cluster around a TV set to watch others of our kind get slashed in a Saw or Halloween marathon; we'll tunnel under the covers with a flashlight to gobble up the last gory and violent chapters of a Stephen King novel.

Why? Why do we like books and movies that dance along the fringe of our nightmares? Maybe because stories -- whether we're telling them, reading them, or watching them --- give us a safe outlet to look our worst fears in the face. They take us to that place of terror, tease us and taunt us, yet all the while we know that if things get too scary, we can walk away or shut the pages. Simple as that. We have control.

We want to be brave and face what scares us most, but at a safe distance.

In every book I've ever written, I've incorporated at least one of my phobias -- whether an emotional fear or a physical fear. And I have plenty to choose from, let me assure you. ;)

In my YA fantasy, Splintered, spiders and creepy dolls each have their moments in the spotlight, and as I was writing those scenes, I felt empowered. That's an impressive feat, considering how deeply ingrained these fears are, dating all the way back to my childhood when I was most impressionable.

According to AnxietyZone.com, we are born with only two fears: falling, and the fear of loud noises. Every other fear is learned, as observed by psychologists in studies called fear conditioning.

My doll phobia started one night at the age of seven, while watching a Twilight Zone episode about a murderous talking doll, a pre-cursor to Chuckie. Here's a two-minute summary:

The storyline deeply disturbed me, mainly because I collected dolls. I had them on every shelf in my room. After the show, when I went in to get ready for bed, one of my favorite dolls, a Spanish beauty in a lace and satin dress, faced me from my dresser. I'd never before noticed how her eyes seemed to follow my every move.  As I put on my pajamas, I couldn't stop staring at her, aware for the first time how creepy she was. Maybe it was a result of staring too long without blinking, but the edge of her mouth appeared to wriggle, forming a sneer. I screamed at the top of my lungs, tossed her outside my door, and decided I would never like dolls again. I sold the entire collection in a garage sale shortly after, and to this day, dolls still have the uncanny ability to chill me to the bone.

With spiders, I was even younger, maybe five. But I still remember the distinct moment the seed of terror blossomed to a full-fledged thorn in my side. My older brother and I were playing in the backyard. He'd always fancied himself an insect warrior, so when a huge wolf spider scuttled out from the woodpile, he didn't hesitate to smack it with a skinny log. Problem was, this spider had babies all over its back, and the instant mommy got squashed, they scrambled all across the grass and our feet like the red sea closing in.

How many babies, you ask? This might give you an idea:

Wolf spiders are famous for piggy backing dozens upon dozens of babies on their back. YES. They're good mommies. But holy gruesome baggage, Batman! That spider's back isn't the only one that's tingling. 

Now that I've used these two fears in a book, does that mean I'm over them? NO. I still get shivers watching those videos above. But, it did give me a moment of control, and a constructive outlet for those irrational emotions.

So what are your fears? Do you find yourself drawn to books or movies that gravitate around those things? Maybe you have more in common with those film makers and writers than you ever imagined. Maybe they have walked inside those same nightmares and wrote a book or film to try face their own fears head on -- from a distance.