Friday, May 17, 2013

Weird Stuff I Have on my Desk

Jordan Dane

In a recent interview, someone asked me about my writer’s desk. They wanted pictures. My desk is in a constant state of clutter. I have books ideas, edit notes, and research piled high. Even though it looks like a complete mess, I generally know where everything is. I’m better organized online, but I am a packrat.
A better thing to talk about are the weird things I’ve accumulated over years and KEEP on my desk. While I was gone to the OWFI conference in Oklahoma recently, my husband waited for me to leave town before he cleaned my office. Basically he took the things I had in moving boxes and displayed them so it didn’t look as if we just moved in. I have taken over our upstairs media room and use it solely for my office. It’s like an apartment, suitable for my desktop sprawl so we can keep the rest of our house in order and pretend we are grown-ups. 
When I got back from OK, my office looked like someone could really work there. It was like taking a trip down memory lane, too. He hung my awards, recognitions, and B.S. degree. (I write fiction. Of course, I have a degree in BS. Duh.) He also has a section of photos on the wall - fun pics of salmon fishing with friends when we lived in Alaska. I have my writing contest certificates and old volleyball trophies and plagues when I was a player and coach in Alaska. My office is like a time machine now.
I tell people that I use toys to keep me plugged into my inner child so I could write YA, but that’s not entirely true. I am NEVER far away from my inner child. Since I chose not to have kids, I’ve never had to be a good example to ANYONE. So my inner child is totally me. Writing YA only gave me a reason to get worse. So the things I have on my desk were accumulated BEFORE I wrote YA.
Here are a few:
Pog Mo Thoin sign – a gift from my aunt and grandmother. It means "Kiss my Ass" in Gaelic. (Yes, I’m bilingual in obscenit-ese.)

Hat collection – My Greenbay Packer cap lights up and flashes & I wear my hardhat & bee antennas to ward off writer’s block.

Walkie-talkies – Doesn’t everyone have these on their desk? My husband and I recently used them to trap a stray Great Dane in our backyard to rescue him. True story.

Screaming Tomahawk – When you strike it on a surface, it screams bloody murder. I use it for scary scene writing to get me in the mood.

Mr Perfect Doll – Pull a chord on his back and he tells me whatever I need to hear. And no, he is not anatomically correct.


Diva Dog - This was a gift from very dear friends who thought Paris Hilton and I would have plenty in common once I got famous. The stuffed dog is a purse with a pen zipped into its back for autographs.

Okay so I have dished the truth about my office and desk where I write. Now it’s your turn. What is the weirdest thing on YOUR desk…at home or work? I want deets, people. We’re all friends here. I promise not to tell anyone, so spill.


Anita Grace Howard said...

Haha! What a fun post, JD!

I love how you ward off writer's block with bug antennae. ;P

Let's see, probably the strangest thing on my desk are my Hoops and Yoyo stuffies. If you don't know who they are, here's a pic:

They cheer me on and are always happy to see me, even when my WIP might not be. :)

Jordan Dane said...

Those big-eyed creatures would freak me out, like they never sleep...and expect me to work. Eek! I'd want to juggle them.

Tge bug antennae reminds me of you and your amazing book, SPLINTERED, my lovely.

Sechin Tower said...

Such a great post! This could also make a great writing exercise to flesh out a character. What would he/she have on her desk? In her pockets? On his kitchen counter.

My desk is relatively clean but there's always miscenaleous envelopes shoved to one corner. I've also got a bobblehead zombie and at least two lego minifigures at hand at all times.

David James said...

First, let's discuss how we all now need walkie-talkies so we can communicate offline. Or cups tied to strings. I'm cool with either. It will be very Goonies of us.

Second, my desk is Willy Wonka on steroids. Also, writerly things like sticky notes and pens and MFA books and whatnot.

I need a bigger desk.

Jordan Dane said...

Okay, dude. I want to see a future post of YIUR desk, Willy.

Jordan Dane said...

I figured you'd be pretty organized, Sechin. Bobblehead Zombie? Not so much.

Maureen McQuerry said...

I love seeing pictures of writers' desk! I have lots of art around me and a frieze of noses from famous people, a greenman carving and a dish or rocks from unusual places I've traveled. I'm not mentioning the two mugs growing suspicious greenstuff...

Jordan Dane said...

I'd love to see a post about your exotic travels, Maureen. Pictures, too. I bet your desk is organized, right?